From: some forwarder
To:

-Oh, how special! Not...
Subject: Fw: MARBLES

*Rolling eyes*
Date: December 3, 2007 8:34 PM

"Dear God,"

It's doubtful God is on the list of email recipients that was suppressed, and why share stuff between you and God with everybody in your contact list?

"First, my car broke down
I was very late for work
But I missed that awful accident
Was that your handiwork?"

As if God decided you were worthy of being spared an accident but some other equally innocent person or family wasn't - oh please...It's called chance, people.

"I found a house I loved
But others got there first
I was angry, then relieved
When I heard the pipes had burst!"

-Well, golly gosh, that was awfully sweet of you, now wasn't it?

"I know you're watching over me
And I'm feeling truly blessed
For no matter what I pray for
You always know what's best!"

Regardless of cars breaking down and houses with pipe problems...

"I have this circle of E-mail friends,
Who mean the world to me;"

-But all you ever send is chain letters!

"Some days I "send" and "send,"
At other times, I let them be."

Yeah, when you get a rush of freaking chain letters, you send and send, otherwise, I never hear from you!

"I am so blessed to have these friends,
With whom I've grown so close;"

If that was true, you'd send personal notes instead of this sickly sappy sweet junk that's been around the net and back so many times! By the way, being "blessed" doesn't give you the okay to spam your friends with chain letters!


"So this little poem I dedicate to them,
Because to me they are the "Most"!"

Yadda yadda yadda Blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah...blah...blah... Oh sure, I believe you...*Rolling eyes* I would really believe you thought of me as close if you didn't always send nothing but these freaking chain letters!

"When I see each name download,
And view the message they've sent;"

Haven't you even considered why you haven't heard from me in a long time? Uh, could it be, chain letters!? And the last time I sent you a personal note, you didn't freaking write me back!

"I know they've thought of me that day,
And "well wishes" were their intent."

Yes, whenever I wrote you a note and didn't pass on a chain letter! But did you write me back then? Noooooooooooooooo!

"So to you, my friend, I would like to say,"

Wait a minute... 'Friend'? Friend as in, To:

"Thank you for being a part;
Of all my daily contacts,
This comes right from my heart."

"Bullcrap! You don't write me for months on end, and now you send me this stupid chain letter that calls me your "daily contact" and claims to be from your heart - PUH-LEEEEEEEEEZE Give me a picken, ruddy, NFBSKing break! Asif sending that stupid religious rant on my Facebook wall wasn't already bad enough!

"God bless you all is my prayer today,"

This is so NFBSKing phony! You didn't even think of the people you decided to spam with this dreck! You were wowed by the pictures and the midi file that came with this particular version of friendship chain, and by the lame verse itself and you probably only thought everybody else would think it was so incredibly special! You got manipulated by a lousy piece of spam known as the chain email - same as always!

"I'm honored to call you "friend";

If that was true, you wouldn't have sent this crud not only to me, but to who knows how many other people on your junk list!

"I pray the Lord will keep you safe,"

No you didn't, you just sent this canned message...


"Until we write again."

Who are you NFBSKing kidding? You never write me! You NEVER WRITE me! If only you knew why I never feel compelled to write you - but then, that probably wouldn't make any difference, you're so hopelessly addicted to chain letters! But guess what? They're not blessings and they're no way to show friendship! How would you like it if I phoned you and played nothing but recordings of televangelists and TV commercials and never actually talked to you?

"Happiness comes through doors you didn't know you left open"

So can a crapload of the exact opposite! This chain letter didn't bring me happiness and by sending it you've given me more reason to want to slam that NFBSKing door on you!

And by the way, what's any of this got to do with marbles, other than the sad demonstration of anybody forwarding this chain on as having lost theirs?

Sorry, I started out trying to be nice about this in the beginning, but it's just too infuriating!

Please, be a friend! Don't send junk!

Friends don't send junk to their friends!


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